Chickens crossing the road ...
Win 98 Chicken:
Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.
Secures the road first, and then lets every other chicken cross it anyway.
Win 95 Chicken:
Always the biggest chickens because they're chock full of bugs. These chickens are regarded as complete perverts because they've got Active XXX on their minds constantly. Whilst crossing the road, a Win95 chicken explores any nets lying around and insists on every other chicken doing this its way also. Only chickens that can net escape don't have to - usually because they're too fast to catch. Furthermore, when crossing the road, they will spend considerable time thinking as to the shortest route to cross the road by, and then leave all these shortcuts for every other chicken to follow. Win95 chickens are always the slowest to wake up and put to sleep. Most have degrees in geology and seismology, specialising in general protection faults. You'll never be too far from a Win95 chicken because they pop up when you least expect them to.
It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.
It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody
It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.
First it builds the road ...
It crosses the road without looking both ways.
The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to him
on the other side.
It crosses the road after it ensures the road is the same type to other
roads it has previously crossed.
The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.
If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will download
one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets)
Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.
Tried to run, but got flattened by the Web chicken.
Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across
the road in your pocket!
Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid
nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.
Quantum Logic Chicken:
The chicken is distributed probabalistically on all sides of the road
until you observe it on the side of your course.
Don't you dare try to cross the road the same way we do !
No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so
there's no way to tell it to.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES THEN
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING
Spawns chicks that cross the road for it.
No chicken will ever need to go to the other side of the road.
Windows 3.1 chicken:
Tells everybody how good it's going to be on the other side and then
crashes whilst blindly running across.
And here's some sent to me by Joao P. Carvalhinho - thanks buddy!!
To get to the other side.
For the greater good.
It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
It was a historical inevitability.
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.
ARTHUR ANDERSEN CONSULTANT
Deregulation of the chicken's side of
road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was
faced with significant challenges to create and develop the
competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen
Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the
chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and
implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM),
Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge,
capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and
technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program
Management frame work. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse
cross-spectrum of road analyst sand best chickens along with
consultants with deep skill sin the transportation industry to engage
in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal
knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to
synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of
delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an
enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry
cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting,
enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically
based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified
market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core
values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business
integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to
become more successful.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be
free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the
chicken,"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road,
and there was much rejoicing.
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How
many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON
The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the
chicken did NOT cross the road.
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares
why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't
anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking
around all over the place, anyway?"
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which
willnot only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents,
and balance your check book.
The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the
road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time,
whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"
Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved
beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON
The chicken did not cross the road ... it
To die. In the rain.
I missed one?
If you know of any other chickens, do let me know and I'll pop them up here.